After The Show
by turbomagnus
Summary: When he learns that Ember's doing a show in Las Vegas, Danny decides to go make sure she's not up to her old tricks, but That Old Vegas Cliche strikes again. DxE
1. After The Show

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. Whether or not that goal can be reached, we'll see... This is The 365 Project, 13 February.

When he learns that Ember's doing a show in Las Vegas, Danny decides to go make sure she's not up to her old tricks, but That Old Vegas Cliche strikes again.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

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><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"After The Show"  
>By; J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'<p>

-o0O0o-

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><p>Twenty-Five year old Danny Fenton sat up in bed with a groan that caused him to wince, the very sound grating to his already aching head. Stifling another groan, Danny blinked as he tried to get his mind working at full again.<p>

'Okay... Who, what, where, when, why, how, right?' Danny thought as he blinked again, 'Uh, where... uh, Vegas. Tucker found out that Ember was booked for a show at one of the hotels and I came out here to make sure she wasn't up to her old mind control tricks again, I remember that. Heh, remember Ember...'

'Ember, that would be who, anyway," Danny slowly shook his head so as not to make himself want to throw up, 'Yeah, Ember spotted me in the audience, had me brought backstage after the show... some-reason she decided we needed to 'catch up on old times'... like I didn't see her in the Zone a few months ago.'

'How... right,' Danny winced, 'Her idea of 'catching up' involved drinks...'

Which probably explained why his mouth tasted like old carpet and he felt like he'd throw up if he moved too fast, now that he thought about it. He had a feeling that to make things worse not only had he been drinking, but he had mixed his liquors since he was faintly remembering tequila, vodka and something called a 'Sonic Screwdriver'. He couldn't remember the details of that last one, but he could faintly remember voices talking about it...

-o0O0o-

Danny looked at the drink in his hand thoughtfully, "It's blue."

"If you're wanting something _blue_, Baby-pop," Ember twirled a finger through her blue hair, "I've got a better idea..."

-o0O0o-

He groaned softly as a thought occured to him, 'Had we really ended up doing bodyshots off of each other? Geez, what else did we do last night?'

By now, Danny had managed to focus enough that he could actually take a look around the room he had woke up in.

"This isn't my room," he muttered, "I wonder where... oh."

Danny's comment was cut short as the bed shifted when someone else moved drawing his attention to bare shoulders and loose blue hair framing a milky-white face with no trace of the person's trademark make-up pattern.

"If Ember's here, then this must be her room. I wonder how I got here?" Danny suddenly froze and tried not to shout as the implication of that fact hit him...

"I slept with Ember!" He gasped, it wasn't like he was a virgin anymore, but still, this was Ember McLain, ghost, rock star, occasional would-be world conquerer... and appearantly heavy sleeper, something for which Danny was giving silent thanks since it was giving him time to figure things out.

Danny started to put his face in his hands, then he realised that something wasn't right with what he was seeing, so he pulled his hands away and looked at them.

"Shit!" He didn't swear often, he didn't like to swear, but if anything called for a little profanity, this was it.

It was also loud enough to wake up the woman next to him and Ember sat up with a groan and grumbled in a sleepy voice as the blanket piled up in her lap, "Ugh... what? It's too early for anything but sleeping."

Danny tried not to pay attention to the flawless skin that was now uncovered, instead focusing on one of Ember's hands.

"Double-shit!" Danny swore again.

Ember rubbed her eyes and blinked at him, "You swore. Not well, mind you, but I didn't know you _could_ swear, Dipstick."

With his right hand, Danny grabbed her left and held it up for her to see, putting his own left hand next to it, "You don't think _this _is worth swearing over?"

Ember jerked her hand free from his and clenched her fists, phasing through the blankets as she rolled out of bed to stand on the floor in all her bared glory, "Where's my guitar?"

Danny tried not to laugh, "You're waking up in Vegas with a guy in your bed, both of us are naked and..."

He raised up his left hand and waved it, "Sporting brand-new matching jewelry... and your first question is 'where's my guitar'?"

"Yeah, 'where's my guitar'," Ember snapped at him as she gave the bed a sharp kick, "Because I need it to kill you with, Dipstick! Tell me you're wearing something!"

Danny slowly shook his head, causing Ember to swear.

With gallows-humor, Danny remarked on her choice of word, "I think we did that already."

"This can't be happening," Ember started to rant and pace the floor, leaving Danny to try not to focus on the way her hair flowed down her body when it was undone or how all her parts moved with each other with every step she took, "This _cannot_ be happening! I'm a rock star, fercryinoutloud! If anyone finds out that I had a drunken Vegas wedding, it doesn't matter if it gets annuled, we divorce or what, my career is over - I go from starring at rock concerts to starring in trashy tabloids!"

"Don't I get a say in this?" Danny demanded, trying not to pay attention to the evidence that as a ghost blue was Ember's 'natural' hair color.

"No! This is your fault!" Ember turned to glare at him, "If you hadn't had to be nosy, none of this would've ever happened!"

"Hey, I'm not the only who had me brought back stage or suggested we go out drinking!" Danny retorted.

Ember looked upward as though seeking divine intervention - whether that was supposed to be a sudden gift of insight or a lightning bolt from the heavens striking Danny being up for grabs, "Maybe it's not legit, there's got to be something that makes it not legit - no marriage certificate, no parental consent, something..."

"I'm old enough for parental consent not to be involved," Danny commented, "So that's definitely not it. Why don't we try finding our clothes and seeing if there's anything with them first and then go from there if there's not?"

The comment about finding their clothes caused Ember to take a good look at Danny - which wasn't easy to do at the same time as trying to ignore what ten years of fighting ghosts had done to shape his physique - and herself, causing her to loose another blast of profanity.

-o0O0o-

Somehow, in the chaos that their appearant sexual escapades had turned Ember's hotel room into, Danny managed to find his shirt and his boxers. Unfortunately for him, the strapless bra and tight pants that Ember had managed to find had done little to hide her figure, which in turn did little to stop him from wondering just what they had done between returning to the hotel and waking up that morning - much less before that. Then he heard something that stopped him in his tracks.

"Good news and bad news," Ember announced.

Danny looked over towards her, "Good news... Kitty and Johnny somehow found us and it's their idea of a prank and we can hurt them for it? Bad news... Dani somehow found us and it's _her_ idea of a prank and we _can't_ hurt her for it because she's my sister?"

"God, I wish," Ember groaned, "Good news is I found your pants..."

When she threw the aforementioned article of clothing at him, Danny had to step to the side to catch them in his hand rather than with his face. As he began putting them on, he asked the question he wasn't sure if he wanted an answer to or not.

"What's the bad news?"

Ember bowed her head and raised a piece of paper so he could see it, "This was in your back pocket."

Staring at the marriage certificate that he didn't need to see, knowing Ember wouldn't have considered it 'bad news' if it didn't have their names on it, there was only one thought that could form into words for Danny to say, "How does 'Til death do you part' work when you're a ghost?"

Ember looked up and glared at him, "You're asking me? Right now, I'm having about as much trouble with recalling last night as you are, dipstick, which is the only reason I haven't gone all Skulker and skinned you to hang your 'pelt' on my wall."

"Just tell me this..." Ember's new husband sighed, "We weren't married by Elvis were we? That would be a cliche too far for me..."

Danny's new wife's glare deepened, "I _know_ that didn't happen, I might've been drunk enough to marry you, but there's no way I'd let another rock star shine on my moment, dipstick, not even The King."

"So, what do we do, get an annulment?"

That was the wrong question for him to ask, because now Ember had teleported across the room to grab him by his shirt and slam him against the wall.

"Did you not hear what I said about trashy tabloids, dipstick?" Ember snarled in his face, "I'd rather be married to you for eternity then end up on the cover of one of those rags!"

"Uh, don't I get a say in this?" Danny repeated his earlier question, only for Ember to release him with one hand and use that freed hand to grab his left and shove it in his face.

"You had a say last night, dipstick," Ember countered, "Guess what you said? 'I do'. Since for some reason I said the same thing, we're now stuck with each other and stuck with having to make this look like something it's not. There's only one way out of this for my career to survive and you know what that is, Dipstick? _You're _going to play the loving husband, attend all my concerts and be waiting with a rose or something when I come offstage. We're going to act so in love that people get sick of watching us and move on to some other celebrity couple for their kicks. Then, when these stupid rings are yesterday's news, you'll be free to go back to that goth of yours, because we'll be divorced so fast you're head'll be spinning - get me?"

"Sam and I split up," Danny muttered.

"Do I look like I give a shit at the moment, dipstick?" Ember snapped, "So you've got one less person to explain things to, whoop-dee-shit."

"I can explain eloping," Danny said, rubbing the back of his head nervously with his free hand, "It's the fact that I got this drunk that's gonna cause my mom to make me a whole ghost instead of just a halfa... could you kinda let go of my hand, by the way? It's starting to go numb..."

Ember looked down in surprise and a touch of horror to notice that the dipstick was right, not only did she still have his hand, but somehow she had entwined their fingers together when she wasn't looking.

'How the hell can my body be betraying me at a time like this?' Ember complained mentally, 'I'm trying to make a career without mind control, I don't need distractions like this, do I?'

A rebellious part of Ember's brain supplied the answer, 'I do. Shit, that's what I said, wasn't it? Why does the dipstick have to both know about me being a ghost and be hot? Really hot... So hot any girl in her right mind would jump at the chance, so why the hell am I trying to argue myself into thinking it's a bad thing for him to be all mine for now? Shit...'

Realising that Ember was too distracted by whatever she was thinking, Danny resorted to a dangerous tactic to loosen the deathgrip she held on his hand; he gently rubbed the her hand with his thumb until her hand relaxed, all the while trying not to think of other things Ember had that he'd rather rub.

'I had to end up married this way to a girl I've had fantasies about for the last ten years,' Danny winced mentally, 'If she doesn't end up killing me, the sexual tension will do me in. How the hell am I supposed to divorce her in a few months when all I want to do right now is rip that bra off her and pick up wherever we left off last night? Dammit...'


	2. Reactions: The Best Friends

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. Whether or not that goal can be reached, we'll see... This is The 365 Project, 15 February.

That Old Vegas Cliche has struck Danny and Ember, now they have to face the people that know them best... their best friends.

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"After The Show"  
>'Reactions: The Best Friends'<br>By; J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

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><p>Kitty leaned her elbows on the table and looked at Ember, "So, what so important that you had to see me alone so soon?"<p>

"Something really bad..." 'Not bad, great,' Ember's traitorous mind corrected, "Happened after my show in Vegas."

Kitty frowned at the ghostly rock star, "You didn't wake up next to a male stripper did you?"

Ember mumbled something that Kitty couldn't make out in response.

"I can't hear you," Kitty answered in a sing-song voice.

"I woke up next to the dipstick!" Ember shouted, then clapped her hands over her traitorous mouth. Why did her mind and body have to be so happy with this turn of events? Okay, she knew why; the dipstick was a noble do-gooder with a hot body, the kind of good boy every bad girl wants to corrupt. She just wished the rest of her would realise that since they were both ghosts, she'd have all eternity for that, right now she needed to focus on reviving her career. Ember studiously ignored the part that was insisting on pointing out that as a ghost she could have all eternity for her career too and asking if she planned to keep her 'Baby-pop' for all eternity to corrupt him, why not just marry him. Ember was being betrayed by her own damn hormones and thoughts.

"Great kisser, isn't he?" Kitty grinned, referring to the time she had overshadowed the 'queen bee' of Casper High and dated Danny in his human form. The fact that it made Ember growl unconsciously only made Kitty grin harder.

'Oh, yeah,' Kitty thought to herself, 'She wants him.'

"Who cares about what kind of kisser he is?" Ember demanded.

'You do,' that backstabbing, disobedient, hormone-driven part of her mind answered.

"Have you not even _looked_ at my hand?" Ember continued.

Kitty looked at Ember's hands, then her eyes shot wide open and she stood up, knocking the chair she had been sitting in back and to the floor.

"You got married and I wasn't invited?" Kitty screeched.

"It happened in Vegas, Kitty!" Ember retorted, "There wasn't exactly anyone invited."

Kitty reached a conclusion, but it wasn't the one Ember was trying to lead her to, "You eloped? That's even more romantic!"

"Kitty!" Ember snapped, mentally cursing the fact that her best friend could be so featherbrained sometimes, "We got drunk, we got married, nothing romantic!"

"You're still together," Kitty countered, "You didn't get a divorce the next day or anything, right?"

"Yeah, because it's the only way to save a Vegas Weekend Wedding from turning my career into another train wreck!" Ember shot back, "I'm trying to revive it after that geek friend of the dipstick's killed it back then."

"Your career's not that important," Kitty waved a hand, "You can just brainwash people into buying your cds again. I think the fact that my best friend has gone for her Mrs. degree is a lot more interesting."

Ember blinked, "My what? And anyway, I'm trying not to do that this time, Kitty, no mind control, I mean it."

"Aw, how sweet," Kitty smiled at Ember, "My best friend's going on the straight and narrow to keep her new husband happy."

Ember growled at the other ghost girl, "I have _not!_"

"It's okay, Ember," Kitty said in a concillatory tone, "I'll understand when you can't get together for a Girls' Night Out because you'd rather stay home with Mr. McLain... or are you Mrs. Fenton?"

"Kitty!" Ember shouted, "We're married just long enough for those bloodsuckers in the press to move on to some other celebrity, then it's _over_, got it?"

'Only if you want it to be,' that rebellious train of thought blew its whistle again.

"Sure, sure," Kitty smirked, then suddenly she had the table covered with bridal magazines.

"What the hell?" Ember exclaimed.

"Well, you're busy protesting," Kitty pointed out, "And I'm still your best friend, so it's my duty to arrange the belated bachelorette party, a real non-Vegas wedding for when you two decide that you can't have a life or afterlife without each other, and..."

Kitty squee'd, "Baby shower!"

"What!" Ember shouted.

"A baby!" Kitty answered excitedly, "You know, a little being half you and half him? I get to be godmother, right? Maybe that'll be what it takes to finally push Johnny into making everything official? Oh, this is gonna be great! Your ghostlings and mine can grow up together; besties just like their mommies!"

As Kitty hugged herself in happiness, Ember groaned and the rebellious part of Ember's mind spoke up...

'It could've happened the other night, you know. If it didn't you've still got plenty of time... think of all the fun you can have practicing...'

Ember groaned again, her best friend had gone insane and part of her own mind had gone along with her...

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

Danny Phantom knocked on his best friend's window and phased through the wall when Tucker Foley gestured for him to come in.

"Hey, Tuck', we need to-"

Tucker held up a finger to cut Danny off, which made the halfa a little nervous since Tucker wasn't normally this quiet.

"'We need to talk'. That what you were about to say, Danny?" Tucker asked, reaching out for a paper that was laying on his printer, "About what? Something like this?"

Danny looked at it and winced, "Shit."

The paper was a print-out from an internet news site with a very clear picture of Danny Fenton and Ember McLain in a Las Vegas bar, sharing drinks, with a bold headline over it, 'Rock Star McLain With Date For Drinks'.

Tucker ignored the uncharacteristic profanity coming from his friend, "Or maybe something like this?"

Tucker now handed Danny another print-out, this one with a picture of Danny actually carrying Ember bridal-style through what Danny recognised as the lobby of the hotel where she was staying, their left hands entwined and even if someone couldn't see their rings in the larger picture, there in the corner was an enlarged insert clearly showing the matching bands on their hands, topping it all off was the alliterative headline 'Mystery Man Marries McLain'.

"Shit, shit, shit," it suddenly occurred to Danny that he had sworn more since waking up in Vegas than he had in the rest of his life, Ember seemed to be a corrupting influence on him. Danny quickly focused on what Tucker was saying to distract himself from other ways he'd like Ember to 'corrupt' him.

"I can forgive you for marrying Ember, man, you make a cute couple," Tucker tapped the picture of the newlyweds, "And even for not inviting anyone - we know Sam wouldn't have been able to 'forever hold her peace'..."

Tucker then looked at Danny over the rims of his glasses, "But the fact that you went to one of Ember's concerts to begin with and didn't invite me, knowing I'm a fan? That, I can't forgive, Danny."

Danny's jaw dropped and he stood there gaping at his best friend, that was why Tucker was upset when he showed up? Because he had been at the show and hadn't taken Tucker with him? Not for the first time, Danny considered the fact that Tucker had some really weird priorities.

"Since I'm now the Best Friend-in-law..."

'The what?' Danny thought.

Tucker went on, "I'm expecting tickets to all your wife's concerts now - I'll be nice and not go for backstage passes every time."

"Uh, Tucker," Danny held up his hands, still holding the print-outs, "We're not staying married. We're together just long enough for it to be out of the news, then she wants it over."

"Yeah, right," Tucker scoffed, "I'm the one who had to share a tent with you last time we went camping, man - you talk in your sleep and trust me, Ember is literally the girl of your dreams."

"Uh, what?" Danny blinked, hands falling to his side and print-outs dropping to the floor.

"Danny, you talked in your sleep and dreamed about just about every girl we know, human and ghost, Sam included, but some of the ones you had about Ember," Tucker shook his head, "I had to get out of the tent, man, they were more than I needed to hear."

Danny turned a strange color caused by trying to go pale and blush at the same time when Tucker said that.

"I've known you longer that I should probably be willing to admit," Tucker went on, "And even if you're clueless sometimes, you're not stupid. You've wanted that girl for a long time and now you've got her... somehow, I don't think you're gonna let her go that easy."

Danny rolled his eyes, "Yeah, you've known me way too long. Do me a favor, Tuck', don't share that little fact with anyone. If I'm going to try to keep Ember, I don't need it getting back to her and scaring her off, okay?"

"Sure thing, man," Tucker chuckled, "Just don't forget to invite me to the wedding... vow renewal, whatever its called when you do it a second time to confirm it."


	3. Reactions: Skulker

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 16 October.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"After The Show"  
>'Reactions: Skulker'<br>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>Danny Phantom clenched his fist and clenched his teeth, growling angrily at the ghost in front of him, "Skulker, I am so not in the damn mood for this right now."<p>

"Do not worry, whelp," Skulker raised an energy cannon and pointed it at him, "I'll make this quick and painful. Then I will mount your pelt in a place of honor on my wall."

Danny's hand suddenly became engulfed in the largest ball of ectoplasmic energy he had created in a long time, "Last chance, Skulker; just walk away..."

"I would have waited an eternity for this, whelp," Skulker retorted as he pulled the trigger and fired his cannon.

Almost at the same instant, Danny raised his hand and released this own energy blast. The two opposing energies flew towards each other until they almost collided, instead being warped and each thrown off course by the different polarity of the other energy and flying away off into the distance instead of towards their original targets. Before Skulker could charge another shot, Danny had brought his other hand up, glowing with more ecto-energy.

"I've had a long week, Skulker," Danny snapped, "This is your last chance before I decide to do something a little more permanent than putting you in a thermos."

"I will have your hide for taking what's mine, whelp!" Skulker spat back at him.

Danny frowned, "What the hell are you talking about?"

"I have seen the mortal world's news," Skulker snarled, "Ember is mine, not yours, whelp!"

"Seriously, could you stop calling him 'Whelp', it sounds stupid," Ember remarked as she floated up to hover beside her ersatz-husband.

"After I'm finished with him, you're next, you cheating... scarlet woman!" Skulker snapped at her.

"'Cheating scarlet woman', never mind how stupid that sounds... Are you mental?" Ember spat at the hunter-ghost, "We _broke up_!"

"...That doesn't mean we aren't still a couple."

"Yes, it _does_," Ember snapped, "Since you're such an idiot, Skulker, I'll spell it out for you, we broke up, we're not a couple, that's what breaking up _is_, and you have no say on what I do, who I see, or who I marry... _Got it_?"

The fact that Ember's ponytail was now standing almost straight up and flickering wildly, sending sparks of flame in every direction, only served to emphasis her anger with the hunter. As a man once said, what happened next is hard to tell, some thought it was heaven, others thought it was hell. Either way, by the time Ember was done with Skulker, onlookers weren't sure whether to call him medical assistance... or a chef with a can-opener. It quickly became academic as Danny sucked Skulker into a Fenton Thermos; crushed armor, third-degree burns and all; froze it into a ball of ice, then hurled it off into the distance.

"Well, at least some things haven't changed," Danny muttered to himself, "Skulker's still a stupid green ball of slime..."

Breathing heavily from the adrenaline rush that came from kicking Skulker's butt, Ember looked at Danny and frowned, unsure of what to make of his words.


	4. Reactions: Sam

Author's Note: The 365 Project is an experimental _multi-fandom_ project to write and post at least one short every day for the next year, not including my semi-regular bi-weekly updates. For more details, see the relevent section in my profile. This is The 365 Project, 17 October.

In the immortal words of Samuel L. Clemens... "Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted; persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished; persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR."

Disclaimer: "Danny Phantom" and all associated characters and situations are created by Butch Hartman and used for entertainment purposes without permission or intent to profit.

* * *

><p>-o0O0o-<p>

"After The Show"  
>'Reactions: Sam'<br>By J.T. Magnus, 'Turbo'

-o0O0o-

* * *

><p>It was shades of a 'Girls' Night Out' in Amity Park; Samantha Mason had one of Fentonworks' ghost blasters and was taking shots at Ember McLain with a snarl on her face. Ember was dodging and returning fire with her own blasts from her guitar, and all the while two men watched from the limb of a nearby tree on which they were sitting.<p>

"Shouldn't you be down there, I dunno, supporting your wife?" Tucker Foley asked his best friend before popping a handful of popcorn into his mouth.

Danny Fenton - Ember's husband thanks to a drunken night in Vegas and Ember not wanting her career ruined by a 'Vegas Weekend Wedding' - shook his head, "Nah, I think she's doing okay. I'll just let them handle this between themselves... where did you get the popcorn, anyway? I know you didn't have it when I flew us up here..."

"I guess you don't want any," Tucker remarked through the food in his mouth before swallowing and continuing, "Come on, man, even if she doesn't know, you know you love her."

"I love being a _half_-ghost," Danny countered, "I get in between them, they'll make me _all_-ghost."

"Ah, belated wedding present," Tucker gave him a knowing grin, "I got ya."

"...Don't make me hurt you, Tuck'."

Tucker froze with another handful of popcorn halfway to his mouth, "Hurt me how?"

"Well, I'd probably start by shoving you out of this tree so that you land in between those two," Danny said in a too-casual voice.

"I'll behave," Tucker replied quickly, then frowned, "We're in New Jersey, right?"

"Right."

"United States of America, right?"

Danny narrowed his eyes, "What are you getting at here, Tucker?"

"Then why," Tucker pointed at the combatants dramatically, "did Ember just throw an _okonomiyaki_ cart at Sam instead of a hot dog cart? Where did she find one of those around here, anyway?"

"Hey," Danny shrugged, "When girls start throwing strange things around in a fight, I don't ask where they got 'em, I just dodge."

"That one of your secrets to a long and happy marriage?" Tucker teased.

"Tucker..." Danny growled at him.

"Hey," Tucker held up his hands defensively, "It's traditional; single guys rag on their married friends, you can't blame me for it."

Down on the ground, Sam now found herself covered in flour from the food cart, with Ember looking at her and laughing.

"What's the matter?" Ember sneered at Sam, "Run out of white-out for your face?"

Sam snarled back, "You'll be the one needing makeup to hide the bruises when I get done with you, you lame Janis Joplin rip-off!"

"Oh, that's so insulting coming from Morticia Addams," Ember retorted, "Too bad for you that the Gomez sitting in the tree is mine now."

"Hey!" Danny shouted indignantly, "I'm not a gomer!"

"Go_mez_, dipstick," Ember rolled her eyes without looking back at him, "Like the one that blows up his toy trains... and if you ever ask how I know that, the only thing you'll ever be intimate with again is the couch!"

Sam's face turned red and she clenched her fist as she growled at Ember, causing the ghost rocker to smirk.

"What's wrong, Morticia?" Ember taunted, "Don't like hearing what I've done with _my husband_? I guess you wouldn't want to know that I never found my underwear after our wedding night, would you. Most people wouldn't know it, but Baby-pop can be... _very... _creative..."

Throwing the blaster to the side with an strangled roar, Sam lunged across the game between her and Ember, intent on throttling the afterlife out of the other woman. Ember waited until the last moment to sidestep and avoid the berserker charge, then raised her guitar with a smirk, holding it by the neck as she raised an eyebrow before bringing it down across Sam's rear end with a smack that resounded throughout the town park and knocked Sam forward into a puddle of mud in which she landed facefirst. Sam rose to her hands and knees and spat out a mouthful of mud.

"Hey, don't be such a pig," Ember remarked before swinging her guitar down again, this time hitting Sam in the back of the head and knocking her unconscious.

With a snort, Ember teleported up onto the tree limb to sit next to her legal, if not loving, husband, "So, enjoy the show?"

"Did you have to taunt her like... like _that_?" Danny asked.

"Yep," Ember answered sharply.

"I thought this was just for your career?"

"It is, but she really pisses me off."

Tucker let out a low, cheesey whistle, "Speaking of that, man is she ever gonna be when she wakes up..."


End file.
